Okay, I want to talk about bell hooks’s book on love. It’s quite an intense read from an author known for addressing subjects like the Black experience in America, sexism, and other systemic issues. For her to delve into love is a departure from her usual focus. However, she ties it into her philosophy on fundamental human rights, making it a unique and thought-provoking book.

In a time when many people are experiencing isolation and uncertainty about the future, reading this book felt affirming. It approaches love with optimism, which I’m not usually very optimistic about.

bell hooks explores power structures and how they are entwined with our relationships as children and caregivers. Many of us didn’t have ideal childhoods, and psychologists often connect these early relationships with our adult relationships, particularly in romantic contexts. hooks delves into how the power dynamics we experience as children often manifest as anger in adult romantic relationships.

She also touches on how young children perceive love as receiving gifts, attention, hugs, and kisses. In adulthood, some people equate love with receiving gifts from their partners or needing physical affection to feel loved. bell hooks argues that these perceptions stem from childhood relationships.

One of her key arguments is that love is a decision rather than a feeling. While many view love as a warm, fuzzy emotion filled with butterflies, hooks see it as a verb—an active choice to care for someone, even when it requires doing things you may not want to do. This perspective empowers individuals to actively demonstrate their love, not just through words but through actions.

Another significant topic she tackles is gender roles. As a renowned feminist author, hooks examines how societal power structures between men and women influence how heterosexual relationships express love. These discussions resonate, especially in the context of societal pressures and the complexities of capitalist societies that often prioritize dominance and individualism over love and compassion.

hooks argues that love should be demonstrated through actions, not just words. In a society heavily driven by capitalism, she believes that showing love to humanity and intimate romantic relationships could alleviate many systemic problems.

While the book is well-written and extensively researched, it includes numerous quotes from other authors, making it a compilation of various sources. However, hooks effectively weaves these ideas from different philosophers, drawing from her personal experiences and those of others.

Although there are moments when the book delves into spiritual themes that may seem peculiar, it’s worth the read. Take it with a grain of salt, and you’ll find it thought-provoking, especially if you are interested in philosophy, feminism, or womanism.